Seriously.

I thought the Christmas season was supposed to be a huge time for feel good movies. Apparently, this isn't so. I have not gone to see any of the movies in theaters currently, but I have heard from friends about four of them. If you don't want to have your movie-going experience (hahaha!! Cartoon Network just said "implosive diarrhea"!!! ) ruined/spoiled, don't read any further. These are all downers, I warn you!
Feel Good Movie #1: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
He grows YOUNG, then dies. By the time he's "10 years old", he has dementia and can't remember anything.... he dies as a 6 mos. old infant. Babies dying, even if they're 90 years old, are a HUGE downer. The only saving grace of this flic must be getting to stare at Brad Pitt for three f*cking hours. (Like putting a "*" in place of the "u" makes it a non-swear word. Did I fool you with that one? I didn't think so.)
Feel Good Movie #2: Marley and Me
The dog dies. She has a miscarriage. When the dog dies, there are three small children who have to mourn the dog. Not comical. Why the hell are they advertising this as a comedy?? Let me just remind them of another infamous movie where the dog dies at the end: "Turner and Hooch". That film has been laughed into eternity. See where your fate lies, Marley & Me?? And, I can't even say that there are any saving graces to this flic. If you want the "comedy" of this film, just keep watching the commercials over and over, because apparently, those are the only "funny" parts. Ha ha! The dog is crawling out the car window! Hilarious! :
Feel Good Movie #3: Revolutionary Road.
Now, no one I know has seen this, and I only know the gist of the story, but it does not sound like you will leave the theater with a smile on your face. Leo & Kate are a young idealistic couple who fall in love and marry, but who refuse to fall into the pit of "normality". They want to be the adventure seekers who live by the seat of their pants and have a wonderfully romantic and exciting life together. Yet, just as we all do, they fall into the rut of "normalcy"... he works a job he's not crazy about, she's a housewife, they have children, they have the normal backyard BBQ social life.... and they hate it. Which then makes them start hating each other. I have no idea how this movie ends, but if it resembles real life at all, it ain't good. Saving grace of this movie? It's supposed to be FANTASTIC. Tons of Oscar buzz.... I appreciate a good movie, even if it makes me want to slash my wrists afterward.
Feel Good Movie #4: Seven Pounds
It starts on a high note: Successful MIT grad/businessman/whatever (Will Smith) is riding in his car, texting on his blackberry when *BAM*! Car accident. Seven people killed. (If I'm correct, his wife is also killed). So, in his loneliness and guilt, he begins to find people that he can give back to in order to alleviate his guilt/hurt. The first person, he gives money to (I think)... then he progresses to donating part of his lung... then his kidney... in all, he ends up helping 7 people. The last two he helps are a blind man and a woman in need of a heart transplant. He falls in love with the woman. The irony: He can either be with her and watch her die, or he can die, NOT be with her, but give her his heart that she may live. So, he makes a pact with his brother with specific instructions: He's going to kill himself, but his brother has to make CERTAIN that dude gets his eyes and chica gets his heart. The End.
Apparently, Hollywood didn't get the memo about the fact that the holidays tend to be a DEPRESSING time for people. (I don't know why, really.... I had a great time this holiday season!)..... but, just in case you AREN'T affected by seasonal depressive disorder, go to a movie! You'll be ready to jump off a bridge when you're done!

Did anyone get anything good for Christmas? :D I got a can of Pringles! (they were "bloomin' onion flavor!). And a pilates dvd and mat! And the best: tickets to see Kurt Elling in Pittsburgh in February! John and I will be doing an overnighter! By ourselves! No kids! In a hotel! (I think we're more excited about the prospect of a night of sleep undisturbed by "Waaaaah! I have to go potty!" "Waaaaah! I'm having a nightmare!" "Wahhhhh! I'm thirsty!" than we are about any awesome undisturbed sex. :P